Fantasia 2012 Post Mortem – Part 2 [BONEBOYS mini-review]

Fantasia 2012 Post Mortem – Part 2 [BONEBOYS mini-review]

I wasn’t planning on writing much on Boneboys, but given that many visitors have been checking its trailer on this site, and given that the movie has strong ties to a rightly venerated Slasher film, I felt that it was my duty to jot down a little something on the topic . . .

 

Boneboys had its world premiere at this year’s Fantasia Film Festival and, given that it was scripted by the writer of the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre and featured several appearances by actors from that classic Slasher, I had high hopes for this “spiritual sequel” to TCM.

Boneboys mini-review

Unfortunately, Boneboys is an absolute mess. First off, I didn’t write a full review for this film because it is simply not a Slasher. There’re aspects of a Slasher thrown in here and there—especially during the final twenty minutes or so—but it fails to fit the definition of Slasher as I see it.

Boneboys constantly wavers between attempts at horror that are so dated as to be obsolete, and insultingly unapologetic rip-offs of the original Texas Chainsaw. It’s as though the filmmakers simply wanted to remake TCM in the city but bigger and crazier, with bigger surprises and more crazies. What they produced instead is a nearly unintelligible patchwork of anything they could come up with, whether it made sense or not.

Boneboys begins as a drag-racing movie, complete with insanely stupid and unlikable characters, then becomes a ’50s gang movie, complete with leather-jacket wearing cigarette-actors, and finally devolves into an indescribable jumble of screaming blonde girl and shouting freaks. Oh, and there’s a forced gynecological exam thrown in, just in case the film wasn’t unpleasant enough.

The dialogue is inane at best and pathetically out-of-touch at worst. I’ve read that the script was originally intended as a direct sequel to TCM and, at times, it seems as though it hasn’t been altered once since the late ’70s. When’s the last time you heard a twenty-something say “C’mon, floor it!” outside of a ’70s flick? And can someone from San Antonio tell me if that city actually has spots in which there is no cell reception?

Even the title is out-of-touch. Try typing ‘Boneboys’ into Google images. You’ll get mostly gay porn. Try it in youtube and you get a hip-hop group. By the way, there is no discernible reason why the movie had to be titled Boneboys. I guess the filmmakers just thought it sounded cool and never thought to Google it and see if it had any other meanings.

Seriously, if you ever get the urge to watch Boneboys, simply reach for your copy of Texas Chainsaw Massacre, 1974 (you do own one, right?), and pop it in. Then sit back, and forget there ever was such a thing as a movie titled Boneboys (unless you’re into gay porn, in which case Boneboys is a title that appears well-worth remembering).

Check out mini-reviews for Dead Bite, Grabbers, Excision, and Sleep Tight on AndreFarant.com

Read part 1 of my Fantasia 2012 Post Mortem

Read my complete review of Inbred, as seen at Fantasia 2012